Finally!

So, I actually had a different topic in mind for today, but then I heard that the Supreme Court made their rulings on the Defense of Marriage Act and California’s Prop 8.

I am thrilled to see this. I was raised, and have been raising my children, to believe that, just like skin color or eye color, sexual orientation is not a choice and makes no difference to who the person is. I have plenty of friends who are gay (or bisexual) and I would love them the same if they were straight. I have friends who are straight and if they told me they were gay, it wouldn’t make a difference.

I have never understood this desire that some have to deny the same rights they have to someone else simply because something about that other person is different. Whether you like someone or not, whether your reasons for not liking them are valid or not (in the eyes of others), everyone is still entitled to the same rights as anyone else.

What really drives me nuts, however, is the argument that same sex marriage somehow weakens or hurts so called “traditional” marriage. Let me tell you, I’ve had one of those traditional marriages, and it was messed up just fine on it’s own – we didn’t need any help from a couple of lesbians or gay guys getting to get married.

If your relationship can truly be harmed by the fact that women can marry other women or men can marry other men, your relationship has other, much bigger problems than same sex marriage. No one else’s relationship should ever be able to have that much impact on your own.

Oh, and let’s not forget the argument that same sex marriage “makes a mockery of marriage.” Yeah, you know, I think we straight people, with our more than 50% divorce rate, are the ones who’ve made a mockery of it. I think Brittany Spears, with her 55 hour marriage, and whichever Kardashian it was that was married for 72 days (that’s less than 3 months, if you didn’t realize it!), have done more than make a mockery of it. They’ve pretty much destroyed it. Frankly, maybe same sex marriage could help restore marriage to what it used to be: a commitment, a vow for life. Maybe seeing people who’ve had to fight so hard for that right appreciate it so much, will remind those of us who’ve always had the right, and thus taken it for granted, to value it more than we seem to.

If you find same sex marriage offensive, then simply ignore it. You aren’t being forced to have one, No one is holding a gun to your head to make you attend a wedding for a same sex couple. The only thing anyone has ever asked of you is that you show the same respect for same sex couples that you have demanded for yourself. If you’re not capable of doing that, then frankly, I find it hard to respect you.

I know that these rulings aren’t going to change things overnight. There will still be plenty of battles ahead. But I have hope. Just like the civil rights movement for blacks and whites to be treated equally started somewhere, so does this. And just like that movement has led to the world I’m raising my sons in, a world where people are (Paula Deen and the occasional jerk notwithstanding) treated equally regardless of skin color, this fight will eventually be won and same sex marriage will be as common as interracial marriage, and the “traditional” marriage that so many seem to think is threatened.

It’s a start.